Sorry to be late with this month’s address! I have been busy: for May is a special month in the Hexing calendar! Also, I have several announcements to make.
Although a few curses have been undertaken from the sweetness of felicity, it has to be remembered that all work is chargeable and undertaken as a serious activity to rectify or impose negative spiritual influence. To show true commitment, from now on if the inquirer sends us a picture of their naked body with ‘Hex-Me’ written across it in lipstick, their hex will be given maximum priority.
Now, why was I late? A certain date: the night of 29 April/1 May – also known as Walpurgisnacht.
Walpurgisnacht! Oh night of mysterious presences, when dark forces abroad to celebrate with their chosen few! While Hallowe’en appeals to the ignorant and profane, Walpurgisnacht is the eve when the occult cognoscenti emerge to curse, cast and celebrate untroubled by the rabble.
On this night of nights I decided to visit the celebrated Ms Rivers in NY. Walpurgisnacht represents an awesome opportunity for Hexing and spell-craft: lost spirits roam abroad; time is disrupted; the past and the future caress the present; and primal energies seep from the very earth itself. Yes, Walpurgisnacht does it for me: and for Kelly too, as I was about to discover.
It must be said that Ms Rivers is an ardent feminist: and, like most feminists, she broadly detests men. In her spacious apartment are all the accoutrements of advanced curse-casting. Her speciality is hexing errant males; but love, that eternal and arcane mystery is her true passion – witness the many potent spells of attraction she has cast for Hex-Me’s female users.
I lay on her divan and watched in rapture this driven sorceress at work. Charcoal smouldered; the blood of (male) furry animals flowed; Kelly’s erudite lips babbled miraculous spells; until, at last, she was done, closing her circle with an obscure banishing ritual old when this world was young. We fell to idle chit-chat and I learned that Kelly is working on a book.
“A no nonsense guide to spells and curses, is all, Mister Man,” was her scathing rebuttal of my interested questions. I also know Dr Ksahtriya, Rene Chevalier and the peerless Romany Marvel himself are working on books right now.
Kelly did not see me to the airport; in fact, she did not see me to the door! I even had to ring a cab with my mobile, as her phone is ‘for women only’.
Nevertheless, what an interesting evening: such brusque treatment was repaid in spiritual coin a thousand-fold.
Farewell! In seven Summer Moons, we shall speak again.
Labels: monthly address